Thanks to an interesting bit of muffin-related espionage, the Fanbyte team has gotten our hands on several (slightly crumb-stained) treatments for Black Mirror Season Six. Straight from the Black Mirror writer’s room in San Junipero, these treatments contain plot details, crucial casting information, and exciting (and totally real) details from the show’s edgiest and most “cinematic” season yet.
Bored and inspired by her newfound love of baking during the pandemic, a young inventor creates a humanoid baking robot and programs him with hundreds of thousands of recipes from all over the world. Baker Bot (affectionately nicknamed “Baker”) becomes a viral sensation on social media, and soon appears on Good Morning America and eventually the Great British Bakeoff knockoff show-within-a-show as an accomplished and exciting baker. Baker enters the show and learns about life, love, and reality TV as he continues to hone his baking skills (and enters a romance with a young baker from Essex whose speciality is Christmas-themed brownies).
Controversy ensues when some of the obviously Brexit-voting show contestants start showing their true colors, claiming that Baker is “taking their jobs” and “doesn’t deserve to live here,” culminating in a gruesome accident where Baker’s left hand is severed and replaced by an old-school mixer.
Baker wins the competition in a beautiful day for android rights, but is ultimately killed at the afterparty by a disgruntled, xenophobic biscuit specialist in an exploding cake incident. Only the mixer hand survives, in a final, poignant close-up.
Starring: Whoever we can get from Bake-off, Anna Kendrick as the young inventor.
In the margins, in smudged print, is a quizzical “can we get the guy who played the shiny robot man in Star Trek? What’s he up to?” And in smaller, block letters, “or we could get one of the Stranger Things kids. They’re all like 25 now, right?”
A controversial technology company (uLyfe) invents Augmented Reality virtual pet software that is able to mimic, to the molecule, a user’s real-life pet. Always-hustling freelance reporter/influencer Amber Luggune makes a virtual clone of her cat, Fluffy, and creates daily videos and blogs on her virtual pet’s real-life ticks and preferences, down to it’s odd habit (like Fluffy) of jumping askew when it hears the door.
Her accounts blow up, and she is invited to uLyfe’s silicon valley office to tour the lab for a special “influencer access” package, exclusive to her millions of subscribers. She tours the facility with Fluffy in tow, showing off all the high-gloss, vaguely menacing equipment used to scan an animal and create it’s life-like (and perpetual, so long as uLyfe’s servers keep running!) mimic.
What Amber doesn’t know is that she’s about to be the first human to undergo the scanning process, which clones her into an AR “person” with all of her personality traits intact. Amber is shocked the next day to find herself locked out of her accounts — and her virtual clone taking over all her influencer duties.
Starring: “Kitten Lady” Hannah Shaw.
A young horror sci-fi TV writer binges Apple TV’s-reason-for-existing Severance for inspiration for his episode-writing duties and goes far, far down a rabbit hole online, picking up every fan theory and watching the series on repeat in his bathrobe for a number of days, culminating in a scene where he walks out and checks his garbage can in the snow. He fully dissociates from his own life, believing himself to be “the sad guy from Severance.”
After reading the gooey promo book from the show several times, he is able to start separating his work life and home life better, only working on his laptop in the basement, living his personal life on the first floor, and changing his clothes each time he goes from one floor of his house to the other — to get “properly into character.” In one scene, he changes clothes multiple times and runs downstairs to upstairs as he is asked to make edits on a draft close to deadline, while he tries to get “One more rewatch in” before he sends off his script.
He suffers a nervous breakdown one night after an intensive study of the numbers in one screenshot of one sequence of the show. As he is wheeled off in an ambulance, he hallucinates Ben Stiller coming over to him, clapping him on the back, and beginning to tell him “you see, here’s what they are REALLY DOING in the office on the show…” The writer smiles and closes his eyes.
The scene fades to black.
Starring: Daniel Kaluuya as the writer, anyone else from Parks and Rec for the fun of it, Ben Stiller as himself in a cameo (if we can afford it. That’s one day of shooting, max).
In the margins, in a barely perceptible scrawl: “Brian, is this about you? Be honest.”